Monthly Archives: March 2011

A Toilet Seat Cover Epiphany

You know how sometimes you just have a random epiphany and then the world seems to make a little bit more sense?  That happened to me today…when I realized I’ve been using toilet seat covers upside down my entire life.  … Continue reading

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You Smell

Dear Fragrance Wearers, I don’t believe that perfumes and colognes were meant to be worn in such large doses that a person is surrounded by a two foot radius bubble of scent. I shouldn’t be able to smell you after … Continue reading

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The Fragrance of McDonald’s

Today as a co-worker and I left work for lunch, I mentioned that the parking garage smelled like McDonald’s hash browns.  My co-worker reminded me that when we left for lunch on a day last week, we said it smelled … Continue reading

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An Apple A Day

When I was younger, I thought the saying, “An apple a day keeps the Doctor away” meant that if you gave your Doctor an apple a day, it would make him happy and he wouldn’t bother you with exams or … Continue reading

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Pilates Dictator

I’m currently enrolled in Pilates classes at a near-by studio and have been scooping, rolling and bridging for the past three months.  I figured an exercise that focuses on body lengthening and core strengthening may be good for my compacted, … Continue reading

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Take A Look At Yourself

I’m always baffled by people who have misconstrued ideas of themselves and can’t see how they may come off to others in a contradictory way. For example, have you ever met someone who thinks they are cute and funny when … Continue reading

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Ketchup Bonely

When I was a kid, my mother would always order me and my younger brother cheeseburgers from McDonald’s or Burger King and say through the drive-thru speaker “ketchup only” but for years I thought she was saying “ketchup bonely”.  I didn’t … Continue reading

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